AS
Av Electrical services
May 19, 2026
The order came completely wrong it's as if I sent in a morse code telegram strapped to the back of a carrier pigeon? Then your trying to explain the order to the staff it is like attempting diplomacy with some one who's half deaf and blind whilst in the middle of a power cut.
You phone up saying, Excuse me I ordered halloumi fries and you sent me a box of volcanic chillies capable of stripping paint off a submarine?
And there’s just silence, Then somebody comes on sounding like they’ve been woken from cryogenic sleep replying, Yeeees… what is issue? WHAT IS THE ISSUE YOU ASK!!!!!
I’m stood here sweating like a glass blowers a** I'm sweating through my eyebrows sony'jim. I’ve eaten devils snack and my tongue’s filing for divorce from my head. Trying to talk to these bafoons feels like every sentence becomes a hostage negotiation, they reply with No no sir… this is normal?
Normal?! It would be if it was on the surface of the sun. You can hear pure chaos in the background and Somebody shouting. Trays crashing, another man coughing like he’s inhaled cement dust. One poor soul screaming WHERE IS THE GARLIC BREAD? Llike it’s the final hours of the Roman Empire. And the communication gets worse the angrier I become. I DIDN’T ASK FOR CHILLS! They reply Okay sir… you want more chills?
NO! Why would I want MORE? That’s like surviving a shark attack and asking for another shark to finish the job. By this point you can practically hear the manager shrugging by this point the whole kitchen sounds like a baboon sanctuary during mating season. Absolute pandemonium, the kind of place where a fire alarm could go off and somebody would still ask if ye want extra dip for £1.49. Eventually you just give up because nobody understands anybody. The driver’s at the wrong house, the pizza’s upside down, the chips are radioactive, and there’s a lad in the background confidently shouting HAM AN PINEAPPLE READY! like he’s announcing troop movements in wartime.
Honestly, ordering from the place feels less like a takeaway and more like being trapped in a collapsing ferry terminal with melted cheese.